Cock Pump Soap Dispenser

Designed and sculpted by CH favorite Pansy Ass Ceramics in their Toronto studio, this Cock Pump Soap Dispenser makes a statement. Available in black, white or pale pink, it stands approximately nine inches tall and features a glossy finish.

Nine-Inch Vase

Handmade by Australia-based homeware brand Degoey Planet (helmed by Alexandria Degoey), this glossy phallic vase is crafted from stoneware clay and finished with a kitschy red gingham pattern (though other color schemes are also available). The result is functional, playful and a little raunchy.

Ancient Phallic Graffiti Wasn’t For Laughs

A very familiar symbol has been discovered near Hadrian’s Wall (aka Hadrian’s Wall) in Cumbria, England—only this one dates back to 207 AD. The penis-shaped drawing isn’t just juvenile scribbling, however. According to archeologists from Newcastle University, these images are common and used to adorn doorways, walls and jewelry during the Roman Era (753 BC to 476 AD) and symbolized good fortune—and power. “Phallus graffiti, …